Tonight I Will...

1. Not try to think about reorganizing my room even as I sit in it.
2. Watch "The Dead Poets Society" while grading papers and read this blog one more time before starting my own school work-grading, averaging, & completing report cards.
3. I will remember as I grade papers and read their wonderful writing that only 18 short weeks ago they barely knew how to think to write a story, and now here they are pushing beyond their limits.
4. I will think of a way to teach word choice without a single thesaurus for my students to use.
5. I will not think about how much sleep I am not getting but relish in the fact that tomorrow will come bright and early with two of the most wonderful people in the world to greet me with it.
6. I will not think about the fact there will be no coffee in the morning, but instead will think about a hot cup of tea instead.
7. I will look forward to lunch with my sister tomorrow at noon, we don't get enough one on one time.
8. I will watch "When Harry Met Sally" if there is time, which there will be time, and I will enjoy every second of watching it.
9. I will try not to be distracted by the lull of the Internet. :) -not likely to happen
10. Lastly, I will listen to new Monkey music. SCORE!

Throwing Up

I believe that throwing up has nothing to do with actual sickness, but rather more of a pay back. See it started a long, long time ago when the first person actually got sick from something legit, a real virus. Then a mom spent a day or worse yet a night cleaning up vomit and that is when the cycle started. A mom (or dad or both) will clean and clean and bathe and bathe a child without complaint when they are sick, more specifically when they are throwing up. There is this real feeling, as a parent you are completely helpless, you know that there is no medicine or the right words, or a kiss in the right spot on the forehead, or a squeeze from a hug that will fix them and that is a bad feeling. Tonight, I anticipated this, I had this feeling, my feelings are not usually wrong, and just as I said to myself, I am going to watch t.v. and go to bed, I heard a cough and then I said, "That was it." and sure enough about a minute and thirty seconds later I had a three year old in my room saying, "I throwed up in my bed." at which point I hurried him to the toilet and gave him a towel to wrap up in and sat him down on his stool and said, just aim for the toilet. As luck would have it, I just washed his comforter & sheets tonight and they just finished drying...luck in my favor. :) So we did a warm bath, warm pajamas, a bowl to throw up in, and clean up began. Hopefully the throwing up is over, I just want to fix him and make him all better. I would hold him, but I am not good, not good at all with throw up. Ask Roo, he can tell you that he practically was thrown across the room today when he coughed too hard. Not really, but I did lunge forward quickly with him so he wouldn't get me if he was going to throw up. I am no good in the throw up game, never have been, it doesn't play in my favor in the classroom either. In college, oh college, I could handle it some of the time in college if I was highly intoxicated, something about smelling the alcohol on your own breath that drowns out their nasty smells and in college at that time everything is funny. Oh, I know you are in the middle of puking your guts out right now, but do you know what you did to that guy, that was so funny! I know you are promising you will never drink that much ever again, but we have to do this again! Here, use my hair tie.

Now, is it just in a dog to want to eat vomit? What is their fascination with that? I can almost understand their own, but don't get IN the blankets searching for it like we don't feed you. I will never understand this act, it is foreign to me, and absolutely disgusting!

I guess I will finish my school newsletter instead of going to bed, just in case I am needed. Of course Nick is at work tonight...but that is okay because I was letting him sleep in on Tuesday when I opened the door and said, you have to get up because Roo is throwing up and I need your help. What a way to wake up!

Perhaps us buying deli turkey meat the other day was a good thing...we'll still have turkey tomorrow. :) There is always a bright side.

It all started with this:
I got this text message Monday morning while I was at the doctor with Roo. It said: "Ryan drew this man." I wrote back: "Yeah right" Nick wrote back: "He really did! I just helped with the suggestion of the pupils, but he put them there." I wrote back: "I don't believe you." Then yesterday morning while I was holding the sickly Roo, homeboy broke out not one but three men. I was shocked and amazed.

Yesterday, I almost fell out of the chair with this:We were typing a thank you card for the little boy next door that randomly showed up last week with 6 cupcakes he made for Rhino. I thought it was rather sweet and deserved a thank you card. We prowled the Internet to find a card Rhino liked, he picked out a football one. Then I said you need to sign your name here pointing under the "Thank you". He busted out his name, I helped with the "n", but the rest is all him. I was so happy, I literally almost fell out of my chair when I looked down to see what he did. I was just told last month that he wasn't ready to write and shows no interest in the writing lessons, to which I said, really? He always wants to write at home, he can trace lines but he doesn't write letters yet. I am really surprised to hear you say he isn't ready to write. But looks like the teacher missed this one. Truly exciting and shocking.

Today I was talking to my sister on the phone and Rhino said, "Mom, it is stuck!" so I turned my head just right and said, "I don't think anyone's kid has ever done this before. I will call you back later." I snapped this picture with my camera phone and then texted it to my sister a few other people because it just made me laugh. I popped that vent right out of the floor and told Rhino that was very creative, but he doesn't need to do it again because the crayons can fall through and we won't be able to get them. He said, like the green & brown one? Yeah, like the green & brown one that I can't see...makes me wonder will this be the thing that breaks the $5,000.00 unit we just put in? HA! I hope not!

This week has been fun at home with the kids, even with the sickness, I haven't gotten one thing done really, but it is more about family than getting the other stuff done. This week has been a good reminder that yes, he is almost 37 months, three years old and almost one month...my how time has flown. (Monkey, you know you like that he did this and that he almost has a color scheme going).

Life Here Lately...

Busy & sick. :)

Maggie=catching a urine sample this morning...that was fun, have you ever had to get under dog while she is peeing to catch her urine? This totally freaked her out that A.) I was so close to her while she did her thing and B.) was hard because every time I got close to Maggie she would stop her flow and move to another place. I am SURE the neighbors got a good laugh out of me chasing the dog with the cup and Rhino laughing and chasing after us in his black Spiderman costume with cowboy boots.

Roo=trying to prepare for birthday party-sick with cold possible allergies-throwing up sick as of this morning and wants nothing more than for mommy to hold him, which would be okay if I didn't have two boys that need me-funny because even though he doesn't even want to eat (that is HUGE) he is still absolutely killing me with his ways-cutting two teeth in addition to being sick with a cold/allergies and throw up-doctor's appointment yesterday-good-no shots have to reschedule those-25 lbs. and 30 inches=big kid. Small victory won at the doctor's office, finally got a referral for an allergists, eight months & two doctors later we finally win this battle...for now.

Rhino=wonderfully great but missing school, one day he will actually sleep in on breaks and enjoy his vacation rather than waking up at 5:45. Doctor's appointment=30 lbs. and 36 inches...killing me in his Spiderman costumes now accompanied with cowboy boots.

Nick=still fighting sinus mess, but wonderful, and never wants to miss a night in the hot tub because that is OUR time, even when it is pouring down rain I have to say no and reorganize the closet instead.

LAST WEEKEND-not the one we just had:
The truck died on 85S and the first thing that pops into my head besides pull over quickly, "Stranded at the Drive In" from Greece. Crazy I know. We had a truck full of gifts including our killer deal on a kitchen set for the boys (it has a grill too!), luckily a tow truck was covered to my parents' house thanks to Allstate roadside hazard insurance, $6 part fixed the problem, a dad that couldn't sleep was able to pick us up, both boys weren't with us (one with my mom and dad, the other with Nick's dad), mom got up and placed new toothbrushes on the counter for us and all was well and we had clean teeth.

THIS WEEKEND:
All was well, Sunday I was sick and Nick couldn't come home because the county was short on Medics...life of a firefighter's wife...this is the 2nd time this has happened in the last 6 months, I survived all is well.

Dad dropped off his old truck for us to use until we can buy a new car or afford to fix mine, "Keep it until you don't need it anymore, a week, six months, two years, it doesn't matter." Reminding me that is the one person I don't argue with when he says he is going to do something-he wants to do it, so I don't argue. I am thankful for the extra ride because the Mazda just can't handle much more until we get it fixed plus it is awesome to have heat again. :) Also, a nice reminder that my mom & dad still love to feel that they need to take care of me, I am okay with that, it has taken a while to be okay with it, but I am okay with it now.

Limited time to blog, still have to take a picture of my favorite part of the tree...will do. :) Happy Thanksgiving!

Quote from another blog...

"A man should never be ashamed to own that he has been in the wrong, which is but saying...that he is wiser today than yesterday."

Jonathan Swift

(1667-1745)

For Monkey

Today in the truck we listened to this song because Rhino wanted to listen to the red cd. I said you want to listen to Ozzy Ozbourne? He said yes! So the first song came on and I was singing along and then really for the first time realized what he was actually singing and then I was like Monkey's 36 Rules!

"Crazy, but that's how it goes
Millions of people living as foes
Maybe its not to late
To learn how to love
And forget how to hate
Mental wounds not healing
Life's a bitter shame
I'm going off the rails on a crazy train
I've listened to preachers
I've listened to fools
I've watched all the dropouts
Who make their own rules
One person conditioned to rule and control
The media sells it and you have the role"

Maybe I am not too far off base with some of the things you have said lately including a recent faculty post as well.

This year we broke every tradition in the book, we didn't wait until the day after Thanksgiving, we didn't even wait a week after Thanksgiving, we joined in with the stores-we decorated for Christmas. While I know this might make SBB have a stroke just at the thought of this, I must say we are home too little in December and this year we will actually enjoy our Christmas decorations. I would really like to show you a picture of the my favorite part of the tree, but apparently the camera is dead...again. So, soon I will post pictures soon.

I am so glad this week is over, it has been rough. Really rough, but I have had a lot of depressing posts lately and that isn't my character at all, enough is enough. The best part about this week, well besides today being Friday and a few cute comments throughout the week, Roo's 1st birthday invitations are ordered and should be in soon for mailing, and at the very least they will put a smile on every one's face. I love, love, love the invitation (well the preview I had), I can't wait to mail them out.

Here's to a great weekend!

YES!!!!

If you heard a very loud & excited yell, it was me! It is 1:03 a.m. on Saturday night and ALL my papers are graded and averages are done. We don't have to send out averages but I think it is a nice way to let the parents know where their kid stands before report cards. (Plus less work for me in three weeks). It is late but I am going to go take a bath now.

Well, I am not going to say anything but I will say thank you for all the comments of encouragement...I am celebrating two days of happiness from a certain someone whom just turned three last weekend. I am emotionally coaching like crazy and I hope it is working.

We are looking for someone to watch Rhino on the days Nick works so that we can pull from him from school. Besides the massive amount of teacher changing, we think it will help his behavior. He won't be so tired and he will get plenty of daddy time, which he loves and craves. It will be a good move for us financially too because it will save us a good amount of money each month. Hopefully, this will all work out, I know it will.

The Past Few Days...

The past few days have been a roller coaster of ups and downs. Sunday, Rhino was in full swing, his crazy kid ways-nothing will please me-I want to yell & scream-I want to hit, kick, bit, & a new one punch you in the face. It took me FOREVER to get to Wal-Mart because of the wonderful mood. I woke up Monday with high hopes that it was over and all out of the system...not so much. Monday I endured a beating on the head, arms, massive amounts of kicking, attempted biting, then clawing that drew a little bit of blood and I am still wearing those marks and then to top it off an abusive push on the brother. THANKS KID! When he clawed my face, I lost it, I just started crying. I couldn't pull it together to go to work, I tried, I talked to Nat on the way to school and decided once I got there that I just needed to take a day. I left some hand written plans and was out of there-I came home and put Roo down for a nap and started to clean. Nick came home at 9:30 asked very few questions and waited on me to volunteer information. I cried most of the morning even while I cleaned, Nick knew I was working something out when the curtains came down and the broom went across the ceiling and up & down the walls. When I get super stressed I deep clean, sounds weird I know, but it is the one thing I can control, I can control how clean it gets how straight it is how long I do it and when I am done I can look around and see a clean house...it is a good feeling. Roo slept for FOUR hours so I was able to cry while I cleaned and get it out of my system. Tuesday, more of the same but I only had to endure him for a few hours in the evening. This morning...yeah, well I was 15 minutes late to work which doesn't sound like a lot but really I was like 45 minutes late. We don't HAVE to be there until 7:30 but I am usually there no later than 7:05, 7:10 is running late. Tonight more of the same but worse since he hit me in the head with his shoes and then beat the crap out of my left arm, slapped me in the face, attempted many more hits, attempted to bite me, tried to claw his brother's legs, screamed and cried for about 3 hours...no lie, 3 hours. I don't wish this on anyone, it is tiring and trying...tonight while I was trying to rock Roo to sleep I went on the front porch so Rhino could scream & cry all he wanted and I could still rock Roo to sleep. Then after about 5 minutes of silence Rhino comes walking around the house and starts yelling he wants a hug. See isn't that nice? Not really, not when you think about he was screaming this, he left the house with no adult, he did take the time to put on his shoes, thankful our driveway is not right next to the road, but instead of escaping I just opened it up to the neighbors to hear. :( It is bad enough that I had to stand in Nick's sister-in-law's driveway for 20 minutes while he screamed & cried, hit, punched, bit, etc. while one of her neighbors looked on. To keep from receiving any of this I would place him gently on the ground or push him away (NOT down) from me and he would yell, "Momma quit pushing me!!" I am sure DFACS will be visiting soon.) Today we got a call from Rhino's teacher that she will no longer be teaching him and he was a pleasure to teach and she loved him. I cried. I did. This caught me so off guard and seriously, leaving out any work issues, I have enough stuff going on. So I was like okay, why? She said the school said it was because of budget cuts. That sucks! She is a great teacher, what sucks even more? We didn't know...we didn't know she wasn't there today, and here it is 12:24 a.m. and we still don't officially know. She thought the parents were notified-we weren't. So I am really pissed because of reasons already stated but for some very big ones too. Monday night I went to a meeting involving myself, the assistant director, & the PTO president, the assistant director never mentioned his teacher leaving. Tuesday Nick did a fire safety class and no one mentioned it to him either. Then the thought comes to my head, who is teaching his class? If you take out the teacher that leaves ONE teacher's aid for 20+ kids ages 3-6. Anyone? Anyone? Does anyone know how illegal this is? I am pissed for those reasons and for the fact that since August this is the 2nd time this has happened his lead teacher was dismissed and we were notified later. (Well in his most recent teacher's case we haven't been notified) His afternoon teacher's aide was let go without notice, just a little snippet in a random newsletter. I did e-mail the school when this happened and asked if it was typical of them to have so many staff changes in a school year. (At that point we are talking two in a month...these are kids!) So I wonder what kind of education is my kid getting? Where is the love for the children at the school? Why is his "loving" environment so nutty and unstable? I am dealing with a highly emotional child and this just makes it worse. So after talking to Nick, who is at work tonight, it was decided to pull him from the school. We just paid tuition yesterday...good timing. I sent out an e-mail asking if anyone knew anyone interested in a little part time work & money. I plan on checking out some daycares in the meantime. This week has been the most insane week of my life, keep in mind I am leaving out work stuff too, because it has been one crazy week there too. So I am doing my best to keep my spirits high and I know, I KNOW that I am not in control of what happens, I know that when I gave up control the other night that things would happen...but for the better. I have been praying and praying about next year. Rhino's tuition is so expensive it eats my extra money up...perhaps a plan is unfolding. We will see, in the mean time if you know me and see me and I look haggard well just smile at me and we will just keep going. :) This all will work out and it all will turn out good and I will learn so much from everything.

Halloween

We went to Hallelujah Night at church and it was a lot of fun! We were pretty impressed last year, but this year was better in my opinion. It is amazing to me to see the amount of people that come out for this event! Rhino was Spiderman (I know you all are shocked and falling over dead) and Roo well naturally he was a kangaroo and probably my favorite costume! Well worth the $2.99 and $7.99 in shipping!

Birthday Walk

At the school they ask for a birthday walk timeline, a picture to represent each year. This sounds so simple, but was tough for me. We have a TON of pictures of Rhino to choose just 3? Too hard. I was thinking of a birth, six months, one year, two year, birth of brother, then three year. That was too many. Then I thought of themes: all summer, all cake at each birthday-would've been PERFECT except my camera died as we were blowing out the candles yesterday and he didn't feel good so there was no eating of the cake...sad. So I thought and thought and then I came up with the pumpkin theme. Every year we go to the pumpkin patch so I ordered the pictures on Wal-Mart.com and made the 3rd trip to Wal-Mart since Thursday. I realized when I got home an error, I chose pictures with Rhino under the tent with the precut pumpkins for year 2 & 3 and his 1st year is in the field. This is when I said, it is just for school! :) So here are pictures of my very last minute meant to start this last month so it would be the best one they have ever seen oh well it isn't perfect birthday walk timeline. (one with a glare and the other with crappy lighting-oh well!)